The Kristen Archives

Personally, I always thought that reading erotic stories instead of watching actual pornography was for pimps and women without real dicks. In the past, if someone had told me that my opinion on this topic would change, I would have slammed them on the spot. But, well, it seems I was wrong. Because there is one site that I could get a little interested in and it is called Kristen Archives (Kristen ASSTR).

First of all, I only find value in HQ porn, but that includes high quality erotic stories. Opening the site for the first time may be a bit confusing. It's not the 90's anymore and the design of the site has nothing to do with this.

I mean, sure, the black background is easy on the eyes, but if the designers at Kristen Archives are reading this, what are you guys thinking? In terms of functionality, this is not a bad site overall, but again, both the porn and the site should be top-notch quality. I think you can overlook the fact that the site's design is a bit clunky, as there is a lot of high quality material on the site.

All you need to do to see everything this site has to offer is just scroll down or up... I guess creating a basic menu button was "too cool" for them. Anyway, the site introduces itself at the top and there you can learn about how it all started. However, the introduction of this site could have been worded better, as it doesn't make me want to read any of the stories.

But don't worry about that. The creator of this site is not a story writer. The reason this site is called "Kristen Archives" aka "Kristen Stories" is basically because this one woman was (if you ask me) a little too lonely and had time to collect these erotic stories back in 1997 (or so I am told). So we have over 15,000 stories and an illustrated archive, and the reason I say she didn't have time is because the majority of the stories here are actually high quality fap material.

Knowing that this is a chick's archive-based website, this design makes a lot more sense. Because it is very likely that the woman behind this website is actually a woman as well. That is, she probably wanted to be "original" and did the design herself... It is clear that she did it alone. Now, let's pay tribute to this woman, aka Kristen's collection, forget about everything else, and focus on what this site has to offer.

Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if half of the viewers are gone by now. (Especially if they were all "offensive" women.) Because here you have to use your "imagination", which many of us don't have anymore. The first offering is a huge number of stories, all categorized in a directory to make it a little easier to browse.

If you are a pansy or a chick, you should check out "Kristen's Board" where the site's community talks about their "feelings". Honestly, I doubt anyone does that anymore. Talking about what you just read, other than using that forum page for site issues and similar crap, is pretty retarded, in my opinion.

Scroll down further (since that's all you can do here) and you'll see other features that Kristen Archives offers. For example, features on resident authors, features on sites, favorite sex sites, etc. I would suggest checking out the sites they have listed as "favorites," as they have a lot to offer. I opened a few of them (not all of them, of course; I'm not a fan of the "favorite" sites).

My personal favorite suggestion was a site filled entirely with fanfiction stories. That site had a little bit of everything, from aspiring vampire fucks to biblical character fucks. I mean, what more could one ask for than a good story with their favorite Christian characters? Just kidding, of course... And if you're not a Bible-thumping moron, I suggest you check this one out.

Now, when it comes to content that makes flaccid wieners erect and chafing pussies soaking wet, it's quite natural that everyone has their own personal preferences (seriously, no woman likes a bushy bush, shaved or haircut). Well, lucky for the thirsty ladies, Kristen Archives (often misnamed "Kristen Archives" or "Kristin Archives") offers a Categories section, which one would expect to find somewhere on the side, right? Scroll down... And then scroll again, and you get to the category archives.

The categories cover all kinds of shit: celebrity sluts, kinky Asian fantasies, pregnant bitches who love to fuck, or swinger stories. But if you're one of those "special" cunts who just can't get enough of the basic stuff, use the search box instead. I said at the beginning that this site is not half bad as far as story based erotic shit goes, but no one can live with this. Personally, I love porn like I love women. It's cheap, easily silenced, and replaceable. But to each his own, I guess.